Shifting Gears

“Shifting gears from this horrific accident to a new doughnut shop opening today.” Newscasters love to use this phrase to jump stories. It makes me feel like I’m on a rotating stage and I’m forced to look away as I spin toward the next scene.

This blog is also shifting gears and focusing more on my journey (barf, this isn’t the Bachelor), on my attempt (definitely more accurate) to write a book. My brain is consumed with this idea that I could write something people might actually want to read. I may be overconfident since the biggest day on this blog has been 16 views but hey, I’m not giving up just yet.

I never thought that writing a book would be easy but I underestimated the amount of time I would spend just staring at my computer or out the window. I can’t focus unless everything aligns. I can’t be distracted by human noise in my house, a needy cat, or a dryer with a bad roller thingy that sounds like a heavy metal band made up entirely of toddlers. I can’t be hungry or unshowered or cold. Even when things do align and I’m clean and cozy in my chair with a blanket, a snack, and the sun is shining while my cat sleeps on the corner of the bed behind me, I can still stare at the screen and let all my negative self-talk spill out before me. Instead of me typing, I imagine my keyboard taking over and spelling out, i-m-p-o-s-t-e-r. I’m not a writer, right? Write.

Today I was sneaking in a little nap and I had a dream about a really tall house with several floors and the top floor was in Paris but there was a giant hole in the actual floor where you could look down and see someplace that I assume was in the U.S. And the main character in this weird multi level home was named Esther and her name kept being played over and over in several different sentences that described her and what she was doing, none of which I could remember when I woke up. The main character in my book is Phoebe but I think that’s going to change. Hello Esther.

Switching gears……

Is it pathetic that the only book I’ve read twice is Emily Henry’s, The People We Meet on Vacation? Writers are usually readers and I am definitely a reader but most well read people can recite passages from the classics and name the authors of those classics. I’ve never had time for any of that. (The closest I’ve come is Donna Tartt’s, The Goldfinch, which was wonderful but took me a REALLY long time to finish.) No, I prefer to get lost in the life of a millennial and love it so much that I download the audio book so I can relive every sweet, funny, sexy moment of it. I swear to God, if I could relive my 20’s, I would be Poppy Wright. Actually, part of me thinks I am Poppy Wright. I am a 26 year-old trapped in the body of a 45 year-old. I’m immature and a big baby sometimes. I’m also put together and independent other times. Mostly, I’m a dreamer. I’m always thinking about what comes next, never really content to stay put too long. I need something on the horizon to work towards. I get bored easily and I’m in love with my best friend. Lucky for me, he happens to be my husband. Anyway, I really love this book and I love Poppy. She speaks to me.

Happy Friday friends. Read a good book this weekend or do something fun and come back and tell me all about it. I’ll be here. Staring at my screen. Occasionally typing.